The world is ending this year, and you need to accept that. However, it’s not as simple as just everyone dying. According to movies, the ultimate source for everything you need to know about anything, there will be some survivors hopelessly struggling against the crumbling world around them. If you want to be one of them, you need to plan in advance. Here are some ideas to get you started on your way to becoming the ultimate survivor in the post-apocalyptic wasteland.

First, you need to start hoarding food. But, Julia, you’re probably saying, I can’t have a proper food hoard, I live in a dorm room! Don’t let this stop you. Invest in as many twenty gallon storage boxes as you can jam under your bed, and fill those with cans, jars of peanut butter, and other non-perishables. Be sure to start early so you can hoard as much as possible. After all, every can of beans could mean another day of survival. If you’re time-strapped, Beprepared.com offers a huge selection of freeze dried food, and a year’s supply is only $3,399.99.

Surviving in a post-apocalyptic world takes a lot more than just food. You see, the world doesn’t get destroyed by nothing. While it could be taken out by nuclear bombs, the sky suddenly raining fire, rabid cats, or other common scenarios, the most likely cause for global destruction is zombies. This means you will need a way to fight them. Obviously, it is simple to have an arsenal if you live off campus, but what about those of us here? Well, it’s time to take a lesson from prisoners and learn how to make yourself a shiv. Survey the campus to find common, sturdy materials, and practice sharpening them. Learn how to defend yourself with a tree branch, or a cafeteria tray. You may feel silly now, but when the zombies attack you during lunch, you’ll be ready.

Your food hoard won’t last forever, no matter how well prepared you are. This is why you must learn to farm. Sounds simple, but there are a few hitches, not the least of which is the cold snowy hell that is a Wisconsin winter. This is why you buy a lot of large pots, and put them in any window that is available to you. Don’t limit yourself to your dorm room; ask your friends if you can use their windows. Take over the lounge of your hall with rows of potted bean plants. Leave plants in the hallway near the window. Your RA will probably be too freaked out by your food hoard and shiv making to bother you about it.

Now the next problem with gardens is that you can’t just hang around on a lawn somewhere tending your plants while the zombies close in. You’ll be eaten in a second, along with your carefully tended beans. The solution in simple: use the roof. Since you’ll probably get caught gardening up there now, and since it’s too cold to garden anyways, I advise just practicing getting on and off the nearest roof a few times a day. This simple practice will not only help you garden, but could be what saves you at the last moment as the horde closes in on you as you make your way to a helicopter.

Why just survive when you can survive in style? Make a survival playlist to be your soundtrack while you toil to stay alive. I recommend death metal, but it can be anything that makes you feel kick-ass. You’ll also need new clothes, since post-apocalyptic fashion is not the same street fashion you see today. For one, the only acceptable color is brown, or sometimes black, depending on the apocalypse. Start stocking up on gas masks, belts, tattered dresses (for the ladies), and other such wardrobe staples, as it can not only save you valuable time, but also make you the coolest survivor in the hellscape. After all, the apocalypse is the perfect place for a brand new you.